Disclaimer

Disclaimer (for the really stupid)…
Submissive Jesus
The Submissive Jesus Prayer Answering Talking Head is for novelty purposes only. We are not tapped into the world of God, it will not really hear you or answer any of your prayers, it isn’t guided by any deity, divine or otherwise. It is a mechanical toy with a voice chip, yielding 100 pre-recorded phrases. That’s it. It’s not blessed, holy, sacred or mystic. It’s a toy! It has no more influence on future events than the Magic 8 Ball.

Anyone who truly believes that ‘The Submissive Jesus is a tool of God and will answer any of their prayers needs to back away from the computer right now, go into the kitchen and prepare a nice warm glass of milk. After that, go lie down for a while, put on some soft music and listen to the calming voices in your head as you recite the lord’s prayer again and again. Do not operate heavy machinery. Do not attempt to drive a car…ever. Please, do not attempt to raise children…ever.

Moreover, aside from this toy, if you happen to be one who believes in a REAL JESUS and/or GOD who will answer any of your prayers, we strongly suggest you heed the same advice from the above paragraph. Your god(s) are as fictitious as an abstinent Catholic priest in a room full of mute young boys. If you need further education, see the Pirromount film, “THE GOD COMPLEX,” available at the Pirromount website. The Submissive Jesus is featured in that motion picture. Anyone who has issue with this disclaimer please visit our complaint department.

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